By His creation of male and female

“by His creation of male and female!”

And by how remarkably He created the male and the female. This third and final oath is more concise than the series of oaths in previous surahs.

While the previous surah (Ash-Shams) emphasized the spiritual balance within each human being, this surah highlights the contrast outside ourselves—how Allah physically created us as two very different creatures: men and women.

Throughout the Quran, the relationship between men and women is compared to the relationship between night and day.

They are extreme opposites yet need one another, and without each other, life cannot continue. Both have dimensions of each other—night slowly transitions into day, and day gradually turns into night. There is a natural diffusion and mixture between the two, similar to the relationship between men and women.

The night is associated with rest, tranquility, peace, and calm. It is the time when everything becomes still—animals sleep, plants are quiet, the world stops moving.

This mirrors one dimension of the relationship between husband and wife, where they are supposed to find peace, tranquility, and love in each other, especially during the night when the world is away and they are alone together:

The day, however, brings activity, movement, commerce, and responsibility. Most responsibilities are fulfilled during daylight.

This represents the other side of the relationship between men and women—working together to fulfill responsibilities, taking care of business, ensuring things are accomplished.

A healthy relationship requires both dimensions: love, tranquility, and romance on one side; responsibility, diligence, and partnership on the other. You cannot have one without the other.

The Arabic words themselves reveal profound meanings. The root of ‎ذَكَر‎ (male) relates to hardness, toughness, rigidity, and strength.

A sword is called mudhakkar (‎مُذَكَّر‎) because it is hard and unbending. The metal top of an ax is also associated with this root. Intense rain that is hard on the body is called dhakar.

Men were created by Allah to be tough—physically and in personality. Generally, men are far stronger physically than women, and are often less emotionally attuned.

The word ‎أُنثَىٰ‎ (female), on the other hand, relates to softness, flexibility, and the capacity to nurture life. It describes a patch of land that is easy to work with, soft, and ripe for growth.

By nature, according to Arab linguistic tradition, a woman is meant to be soft, while a man is meant to be tougher.

This doesn’t mean women cannot be tough or men cannot be soft, but rather that for a relationship to work—like night slowly transitioning to day—both must adapt.

Sometimes softness must become tougher, and sometimes toughness must become gentler. They must work together despite their fundamental differences.